b'final mattersOutside Looking InExploring the value of being a quiet person BY HENRY COOPER SKETCH BY SAMUEL TABER-KEWENEThe following college essay was inspired by attend- dating to endure. When I ran 90 laps in the gym for ing a story slam hosted by CTK College Coach lastthe PACER test in middle schoolsecond only to Iclassmates approach the stage one byHenry Cooper has learned to see the positivemy best friend KaiI came to class with a face bright spring.red from exhaustion and suffered stares from which I sit patiently on one of the saggy, broken-downcould not hide. seats in our middle school auditorium, watch- Ineverwantedclassmatesorteacherstoknow ing mywhat I was thinking or how I felt. Instead, I liked one to receive their much-desired, cheap plas- being on the outside looking in, observing the world tic trophies. All I can think about is the sweatandwonderingwhatwasgoingoninsidepeoples pooling in my palms as my soaked shirt sticksheads.NomatterwhereIwent,whetheritwasa to the back of my chair. The 7th grade Poetryin being a quiet person. Photo by Miles House. baseballgame,theAmericanMuseumofNatural Grammys are an annual event in which students areHistory or a coffee shop in town, I was curious about recognized for the best poems written in class that year, but all my focus isthe stories of the people surrounding me. Years of moving through the world on escaping that oven of an auditorium with two free hands. Having no tro- this way made me a great listener. Even the smallest moments, like in my job phy means I will not have to suffer the grueling walk on stage to thank myat a STEM center where kids constantly need to tell you things like why they teachers. I see my name appear onenjoy apples far more than oranges, or heavier moments when a friend has screen as a finalist for one of thedone poorly on a test or feels like the world hates them, being right there tak-categories, and my heart sinks toing in every word is a comfort I can give. Being able to really listen and un-my stomach. I grip the arms ofderstand people has been the key to finding the value in being a quiet person.the chair and pray my poem willInterestingly, I was never bothered by the attention I received in sports. not be picked. Luckily, the friendEven on the biggest stages, such as playoff baseball games and national track sitting next to me is the winner,meets in which hundreds or thousands of people are watching, I have been and I exhale with relief. Being theOK. I am completely focused on what I am doing, all my energy going into centerofattentionismyworstmy legs as I run or on the ball as I go for the catch. Sports have always been a nightmare. This time, I avoided it.great outlet for me to get away from that anxious side of myself. Over time, I My life is full of terrifying so- started carrying some of that confidence into other areas of my life. cial experiences like this one. InI still am not the biggest fan of the spotlight, and you likely wont see me kindergarten I begged my parentson a stage anytime soon. But I can raise my hand in class, and I can give a not to send me to school dressedpresentation without having to stress myself out a week in advance. I learned up for Halloween. When I even- to see the positives in being a quiet person. The way I see the worldas a tually showed up as Spider-Man,listener and observerwill forever be an important part of how I approach I was terrified I would be the onlylife. one in costume. It wasnt just Halloween that got to me. Throughout elemen- Henry Cooper graduated from Columbia High School in 2024 and will be tary school I had a crippling fear of asking to use the bathroom, as that wouldstudying psychology at the University of Pittsburgh this fall. require raising my hand in front of the whole class, something far too intimi-46/ matters magazine / school 2024'